29 Comments
User's avatar
Katie Lee's avatar

We’re probably buying all your cds and DVDs. My daughter gets loads of both from charity shops. Both her parents are hoarders and she’s inherited the genes. But aside from the urge to collect crap, I think we all also just want to own the films and music we love rather than paying some Silicone Valley wankers rent for them.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

I'll never give up my DVDs because I love all the special features on a DVD/Blu-Ray. you don't get to hear the SFX guy talking about nearly blowing up the set on Ammy P.

I also like the idea of my CD collection disseminated out in the world, encouraging future generations. going to hold onto that thought, it's lovely.

Katie Lee's avatar

She was amazed and delighted the first time she discovered a DVD extra. We’ve lost a lot in that regard. Now it’s all just actors tasting crisps or reading out Google results on YouTube to promote their films. I think we need to go back to making them sit in a sound booth recording opinions on their own performance.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Absolutely! John Carpenter and Kurt Russell doing a commentary is literally two old friends sitting down for a chat and they are all so much fun.

Sara's avatar

Ok I think I would enjoy this show and am strongly on TEAM MUSE. I need everything in its place. Secondly, do the family know this is about to happen to them or is it sprung on them? Like what if they find a whole heap of sex toys or pornography!? Or dead bodies.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

I'm pretty sure the family volunteer, so any dark secrets to shatter Stacy's world view. But there's still some weird collections on display - the line about hundreds of bottles of gin was a legit case in a recent episode.

And please do not encourage Team Muse.

DILLIGAF?IDO's avatar

Good morning Lewis :o) LOL I am on your team on this one. I have carers come to help me and had one last month who decided to 'help' me tidy the kitchen up a bit - she busily put things in cupboards and it all looked absolutely lovely, except when I came to access it, I couldn't because I can't bend! So I had to buy again. Because it would be days before the next carer came to help me access the sodding thing I need! So you end up with two. Then THAT carer decides to be 'helpful' and put it away and... yup... the cycle repeats! I did an audit of tinned soup last month - I had SIXTY tins! Ah, 'clutter' exists for a reason.

I envy those who live minimalist lifestyles. They are not disabled, housebound carers LOL Those are people with a fulltime job, fully working arms, legs and backs; and a life outside the home! Totally agree with you about Stacy Solomon - she's a National Treasure. Loved this show too :o)

Lewis Holmes's avatar

I think SYLO works because they are a more aware and sensitive of situations like yours. It's not like Life of Grime which was very distant; there's a conscious effort to help people and make a positive impact. Lovely TV.

Daniel O’Donnell's avatar

This was great Lewis. Laughed out loud a good few times with your examples of the various families decluttering escapades. However, it is also completely terrifying. I know you've told me about the King first editions before (that's a sore one. Not so much on the Shaun Hutson's as he's become an absolute walloper!) but as our son has left for university, we are looking at downsizing to a 2 bedroom flat. We're currently in a four bedroom house. One of those bedrooms, my office, has a built in library (big cupboard) full of my 500 or so books including first edition King's and signed Barker's. My wife has told me there will be no room for these in the new property. My suggestion of getting a 3 bedroom flat with the sole reason of using the third bedroom to store them did not go down well! I see a difficult decision on my horizon.

Also, great shout out with Airheads. Not seen that in ages. Excellent movie.

I would imagine the Muse would be a big fan of Swedish Death Cleaning : -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swedish_death_cleaning

Quite a grim name for basically decluttering!

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Thank you Dan. I empathise with the library conundrum - I looked at loads of options to keep mine and I just couldn't justify it. If I was you I'd be holding onto the signed Barkers, at the very least. Swedish death cleaning is a good name for an album!

Ian Winter's avatar

“Mary Poppins On Amphetamines”. I’d watch that movie.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

I'm working on the treatment later on today.

Laura Harts's avatar

Wok-quake 😂

Lewis Holmes's avatar

I was rather proud of that one!

Sharon Joslyn's avatar

Great stuff Lewis. I gotta go with Team Muse, but you make valid points…

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Team Muse is spreading as a term. She really doesn't need encouraging!

peninsula's avatar

When you visit the Cotswolds, please stop off at Snowshill Manor, once occupied by a 'collector', Charles Wade, so enthused that when he'd filled the Manor House he moved out to live in a couple of rooms above the stables. It's a very diverse 'collection'. It's also very dusty. Stacey would flinch.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Oh that sounds fascinating. Not sure The Muse would be able to handle the dust though, she'd have a microfibre cloth out in no time.

peninsula's avatar

Google it, Snowshill Manor. It belongs to National Trust now, I think, so you might be able to view a dust free experience.

Francis F's avatar

Love this Lewis. I don't watch that show, but I know of it. I am definitely with the Muse on this, I need to sort out all my cupboards and draws, happy to chuck the lot. As a social worker I work with many clients who are hoarders! It's very difficult to get them to agree to move anything! Cracked me up re your collections. LOL sorry. PS. I am struggling to write comments ? Its so dark and hard to see the words. I feel like your settings have changed or something? PPS my mum read this post and loved it. 😊

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Thank you Francis, and thanks to Mother Frazzledate for reading too!

I haven't changed my settings. I fear that Substack have done some tinkering and half-arsed things, because it was fine up until a few weeks ago. I've tried to lighten the background but If I lighten it any further some text becomes hard to read.

Let me know if it doesn't resolve and I'll just do a radical redesign. Can't lose you, you're an OG Ledgehead.

Francis F's avatar

Struggling, I’m typing this without seeing a thing. I’m on my phones it’s a bit better if I use my laptop! Eeekkk

Lewis Holmes's avatar

To make matters worse (and not trying to recreate the experience of talking to frontline IT support), but I can't recreate what you're seeing: I get white text on phone and laptop.

Colin Goldfinch's avatar

I moved in with my fiancé two years ago. 300 books went to the charity shops, £200 earned on eBay. Fortunately my vinyl and cd collection are still around but there's still several boxes in the garage I have to clear out - not sure what's in them so she says they can just go...

Lewis Holmes's avatar

Books would get damp but those CDs/records should be fine in the garage, right?

Colin Goldfinch's avatar

Books are mostly in plastic boxes with clip on lids

Wendy Varley's avatar

Coincidentally, I watched Sort Your Life Out for the first time last night, and your witty analysis is spot on.

You’d think I’d already be a fan, after clearing my parents’ hoarded home, but I watched so many hoarding shows way back, I’d had my fill of popcorn. But after a long break, Stacey’s approach is cheery and compassionate.

Plenty of my own stuff to sort out, so it’s a useful nudge.

Interesting hearing how you and the Muse have different approaches to ‘tidy’ but make it work.

BTW, there’s a glitch where I can barely see what I’m typing on the black background. (Grey/brown text on black.) Don’t know if you can adjust that in your settings. Seems to be a general glitch if authors choose to have a dark background. Once comment is posted text reverts to white.

Lewis Holmes's avatar

It's a lovely little show, genuine good vibes. It's like the opposite of schadenfreude.

You're the second person to point that glitch out. I've lightened the background a bit which should make it easier to see. I'd complain to Substack because font colour is their default, but they're probably too busy rolling out the red carpet to chinless scumbags.